to carry on

There’s a part of this trip through france that will always feel the way that song makes me feel, that says everything I want to say, that is everything I want it to be.

Impermanence. A word that lives so deep inside me it’s maybe always been all of me.

This transient life racing everywhere because I want everything, to be everywhere, to see  and do all that I can with my sure to be too short life. And so I wanted to fade and never worried about how nothing lasts.

Even gods die, even suns supernova out, and one day there will be no more days, no more universe, no more everything.

And it comforts me, still. To know that I’m but a part of this endless phasing out.

But I want this to last.

You made me feel at home, for the first time in a lifetime of running. To just be near you.

And I fear that we will only be Dreams. You will be mine and I will be yours.

Our shared dream reflecting in one another’s eyes, refracting into thousandths, into only photons until we vibrate and shine as one only to come undone by thousands of miles and the millennial caverns of the heart.

So please, remember me.

It’s funny how strangers can become so much more. How the world looks different after meeting you, how it sounds and feels and tastes like I’ve never been here before.

And it’s beautiful and sad and maybe even cruel, to have to end it here, like this.

I don’t want it to end.

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